[Opening scene - Morning, Braverman kitchen. Zeek, Sarah, Drew and Camille are gathered around the computer.]
ZEEK: How come you don't know her password?
DREW: How would I know her password?
ZEEK: Didn't you overhear it once?
DREW: I don't understand how everything we do is wrong.
AMBER: What are you guys doing?
CAMILLE: I'm officially not a part of this.
DREW: They were trying to get me to look up your S.A.T. score.
ZEEK: What are you, a narc?
DREW: No, I'm not a narc.
AMBER: This is really a new low for you guys.
ZEEK: You got to tear off the band-aid, you know, see what's underneath.
AMBER: [Amber sit's at the computer] What is this?
SARAH: You studied hard, and we just want to be here for you. You got anything?
AMBER: Yeah, here it is. All right, but we have to add these, though.
SARAH: They don't add it for you?
SARAH: Okay, somebody add, somebody add.
AMBER: Do we have a calculator or...?
ZEEK: 770, 770, 710.
AMBER: Okay, so you got to carry the three.
CAMILLE: I said it once.
AMBER: Wait. What?
ZEEK: What's that mean?
DREW: 2400 is a perfect score, so...
AMBER: Hang on. Wait.
AMBER: It might be a mistake.
DREW: She apparently is a genius.
AMBER: Oh, my God! No!
ZEEK: All right!
ZEEK: Come here.
[They all surround Amber hugging her from behind.]
DREW: Literally brilliant.
AMBER: Everyone, get off me!
[NEW SCENE - Kristina is on the phone as Max takes eggs out of their cartons in the kitchen.]
KRISTINA: Yeah, Janet, a car pool sounds like a really good idea. I just
[To Max] be careful, okay, buddy? I don't know anything about an invitation. Which Emily, Berger, Martin? Yeah, Max likes her. [To Max again.] Hey, bud, be careful. Get a bowl.
MAX: I told you I need egg cartons.
KRISTINA: Yes, I'm gonna check his backpack, and I'll call you back.
ADAM: [entering the room.] What you got going on there, buddy? Be careful with it. Hey, Max! [Eggs roll off the counter.] Hey, yah!
KRISTINA: Oh, come on.
MAX: I need, uh, four egg cartons for green week.
ADAM: I got it.
KRISTINA: Thank you, honey.
ADAM: Max, can you give me that bowl?
KRISTINA: Hey, Max?
ADAM: [Reaching for the bowl.] Max?
KRISTINA: Hey, babe, did you, by chance, did you happen to get an invitation?
MAX: Emily Berger's birthday party is this Saturday. She didn't invite me.
KRISTINA: You're not invited? You guys are buddies, though. You play in the yard all the time.
MAX: She doesn't really seem to like me anymore.
ADAM: [Cleaning up the mess] Look out, Max. Ahh.
MAX: Can we go to school now?
KRISTINA: Yeah, yeah.
MAX: I need to get these egg cartons there.
ADAM: Here, go around it. [Walks through the mess.] Max...
MAX: Let's go to school.
[NEW SCENE - T&S, Sarah enters the offices carrying doughnuts.]
ADAM: [To a lady.] I think maybe that the lesson here is that if you're playing tennis with Steve jobs, you let him win.
WOMAN: I couldn't. And lose the bragging rights? No.
SARAH: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry to interrupt. Um, Amber got 2250 on her S.A.T.s 2250!
ADAM: That is awesome.
SARAH: It's amazing. I'm so excited, I didn't know what to do, so I just went and bought a bunch of doughnuts. [To the lady.] Hi, I'm Sarah.
ADAM: This is my sister Sarah.
WOMAN: Nice to meet you.
SARAH: Would you like a doughnut?
ADAM: She's working with the design team, Carly Barow.
SARAH: My daughter's just, you know, her grades aren't great, so...
GORDON: [Entering the office.] You must be talking about how I kicked your butt all over the squash court a month ago?
CARLY: Not at all. I would never say that. You didn't beat me. I beat you.
[The hug to Sarah's surprise.]
GORDON: I don't think so. Mmm! Look at you.
CARLY: No, look at you.
GORDON: We should go talk in my office, yeah.
CARLY: Okay, please, yes. [To Sarah.] It was nice to meet you. Congratulations. [To Adam.] I'll talk to you in a bit.
ADAM: Great to see you, Carly.
CARLY: You too.
ADAM: That is awesome, scorching score.
SARAH: God, I know. Have a doughnut. Don't say no.
ADAM: To celebrate Amber's S.A.T. score, of course.
SARAH: Who is that?
ADAM: That's just a friend of Gordon's from college.
SARAH: Hmm, she's tall.
[NEW SCENE - Braverman yard, Zeek is working on an old tractor as Camille pulls up in her car.]
ZEEK: Hey, babe.
ZEEK: How was art class?
CAMILLE: It was good. It was, um... Really good, actually. But, um, there's something I have to tell you. The teacher who was scheduled to teach this course had a conflict and is not gonna be able to be there for the first few sessions, and the substitute teacher is Matthew, Matthew Boscalli.
CAMILLE: So I just wanted to be open about it. Of course, there's nothing going on. It's all very professional.
ZEEK: Okay. Professional, huh?
CAMILLE: Look, Zeek, I need to take this course. It's the only time all year they're offering figure studies. This is life drawing, you know, with live models. It's what I've been struggling with. So I just didn't want to hide anything, but at the same time, I didn't want to make a big deal out of it either. So, um, I want to take the class, and, um... And I'm gonna take the class, okay?
CAMILLE: Great. Thanks.
[Opening credits - featuring Forever Young by Bob Dylan]
[NEW SCENE - Sycamore Charter Elementary. Joel sits in front of a group of kids including Jabbar and Sydney, Crosby is seated a fee yards behind Joel.]
JENSEN: There's gold in these hills.
JOEL: Whoa! Did you guys see that? That was intense. All right, guys, just a couple of technical things. We only have a few weeks...
CROSBY: Hey, Principal Taylor.
PRINCIPAL TAYLOR: Thoughts?
CROSBY: Oh, I'm just watching.
JOEL: [Heard in the back ground talking to the kids.] Talk to your parents. Have them pretend to be the other characters, okay?
PRINCIPAL TAYLOR: I think this one's shaping up to be a real stinker.
JOEL: [Heard in the back ground talking to the kids.] Right, you do?
PRINCIPAL TAYLOR: I have nothing against Joel, but he directed the play last year, the longest 47 minutes of my life. [Crosby laughs] Here's a thought. You're a creative guy. You're funny. Want to help out?
CROSBY: Uh, with the play? Yeah, I...
JOEL: Hey, what do you guys think? [Crosby nods.] Yeah? Yeah, it's a little rough. Right.
PRINCIPAL TAYLOR: Joel, I've just been talking to Crosby, and he is eager to get involved with our parent community here at Sycamore...
JOEL: Is he?
PRINCIPAL TAYLOR: And, um, pitch in.
JOEL: That sounds great. I believe in him.
PRINCIPAL TAYLOR: What if Crosby became your assistant director?
JOEL: That would be awesome.
CROSBY: You know, I have been dying to be your assistant since we met, so...
JOEL: Perfect. Okay, cool. So, uh, we'll talk about scheduling and all that junk, awesome. I'm gonna get back to it. All right.
JOEL: Okay. [Taking to Jabbar.] How about...?
PRINCIPAL TAYLOR: I'm counting on you, kid. Spice it up.
JENSEN: There's golden in these hills.
JOEL: Close enough, all right?
[NEW SCENE - Community Centre kitchen.]
ALEX: You have way too much time on your hands.
HADDIE: Excuse me. What do you mean? This is important.
ALEX: I'm just saying, all the labels don't have to be facing the exact same way.
HADDIE: Yeah, but it's convenient if they are. You can tell that it's Mexican stewed tomatoes.
ALEX: Whenever you want to talk about O.C.D., let me know, I'm here for you, okay? Okay.
HADDIE: Thanks. Um... What are you doing this week?
ALEX: This week, actually, I'm going to the library. I have a hot date with this guy from Romania. We play scrabble... Online?
HADDIE: Don't talk to me like I'm the weird one. That is weird.
ALEX: What about you, any big plans?
HADDIE: Actually, this weird, weird guy at my school, everybody's gonna go to his house for a party. He made a movie on his cell phone or something, and it's not gonna be good, but it might be...
ALEX: It sounds very tempting and entertaining, but I think I'm gonna have to decline. But thank you.
HADDIE: No, yeah. Anytime.
ALEX: Well, get back to, to work. [He turns some of the tins around.]
HADDIE: What are you doing?
ALEX: Just giving you something else to do.
HADDIE: You're just, like, trying to be annoying.
[NEW SCENE - Therapy session with Zeek and Camille.]
THERAPIST: People listen in different ways. Your face doesn't always read the way you might imagine. That's why it's important to have verbal cues.
ZEEK: Can I...?
THERAPIST: Think of it this way
ZEEK: Can I say something here?
ZEEK: I messed around. I had an affair. But she did too. She slept with somebody else. And now she wants to take an art class from the guy that she slept with, same guy. So, I don't know, why don't we talk about that?
CAMILLE: I told you about the class. I was open about it. I didn't try to hide anything.
ZEEK: I want you to drop it.
THERAPIST: Okay, Zeek, can you tell her why?
ZEEK: Why what?
THERAPIST: Uh, tell her how it makes you feel.
ZEEK: I'm hurt. I'm angry. I'm jealous.
THERAPIST: Okay. That's a good job. Camille, is there anything you'd like to say to Zeek?
CAMILLE: I understand how you feel. I do. And I will think about it.
[NEW SCENE - Late a night, Adam and Kristina are in bed, the room is dark.]
KRISTINA: I mean, Miss Orkand specifically said that Max and Emily get along, you know. They're a perfect match for each other.
ADAM: I was there.
KRISTINA: I mean, they sit at the same table together. They do their class projects together.
KRISTINA: They get along really well. I just think it's weird that Emily's mom would single him out like that, you know?
ADAM: Maybe it's just an oversight or something.
KRISTINA: Maybe I should call her. Let her know.
KRISTINA: You know, mom to mom. It probably just got lost in the mail.
ADAM: Yeah. It happens.
[NEW SCENE - Night time, Sarah knocks of Amber bedroom door.]
SARAH: Can I come in and tell you how proud I am of you?
AMBER: I'd rather you didn't.
SARAH: Okay, thanks.
AMBER: Here you come.
SARAH: Honey... Can you just be happy for yourself?
AMBER: I just don't want to do this anymore.
SARAH: Come on! Look at you. This time last year, who knew if you were even gonna take this test, and now you've done so well.
AMBER: Thank you very much. That's enough.
SARAH: Listen, something happened at work today. A woman came in who was a classmate of Gordon's at Berkeley, and she's still a really powerful alum there. Alum...Nus. Alum...Ni. Anyway, I asked Gordon if she would sit down with you, and he said yes.
AMBER: But why? Why would you do that?
SARAH: Because it's a connection, and--and if she likes you, maybe she can make a phone call or, you know, write a letter to somebody. It's just something that could be really helpful, and so I thought you'd sit down with her.
AMBER: I don't want to.
SARAH: It's such an amazing opportunity. Don't just say, "I don't want to do it."
AMBER: I don't want to do it.
AMBER: I don't want to put myself in an uncomfortable position.
SARAH: Why is it uncomfortable?
SARAH: This is one meeting. Don't say no to everything, okay?
I have to go sit there and prove myself? Then I don't want to.
SARAH: It's a great opportunity.
AMBER: That's easy for you to say. You don't have to go in there and try to prove yourself.
SARAH: Please don't just say no, you always say no.
AMBER: I don't want to. No.
[NEW SCENE - Sycamore Charter Elementary
JOEL: All right, guys, I need you to focus up here. Pay attention and really just try and get those lines out, okay, Jabbar? Let's hear it.
JENSEN: There's golden in those hills.
JOEL: Okay, that's close enough. And, Sienna, do you know what happens right now?
CROSBY: She says, "Does this look like gold?"
SIENNA: I don't like that line.
CROSBY: You don't, you don't like that line? Joel, I mean, even she knows it's a bad line.
JOEL: Hey, take five. Let's take ten. Wait.
[The kids start running around.]
CROSBY: This is, this is pretty slow going. It doesn't seem to be getting there.
JOEL: Yeah, it's early.
CROSBY: They shouldn't memorize these lines. They're boring.
JOEL: They got to do something, not just kids running around
CROSBY: You know, what if I wrote something, you know, something musical. Like a Broadway?
JOEL: Yeah, you think that's
CROSBY: Hey! Do you guys like music?
CROSBY: See how excited they are? They haven't been that excited since we started.
JOEL: Yeah, Crosby, it's just
I'd love them to just memorize these lines first, and then we can think about adding something else.
CROSBY: Okay, but do you like the music idea?
JOEL: I, yeah, I think it's a great idea, just time permitting.
CROSBY: All right, you're the boss.
CROSBY: Did you see that explosion of enthusiasm?
JOEL: Yes, I saw it. Noted.
CROSBY: You guys like music?
CROSBY: Thank you.
[NEW SCENE -
KRISTINA: Oh, hi. Andie?
KRISTINA: Hi. How are you? I'm, I'm Max's mom. I was just in the classroom.
ANDIE: Yeah, Kristina, hi.
KRISTINA: Hi. We met at "back to school" night.
ANDIE: Of course, sorry.
KRISTINA: You know, Max didn't get an invite to Emily's birthday party, so I was just wondering if, by chance, it was lost, or maybe it was an oversight?
ANDIE: Oh. No.
Oh, no. It wasn't. Oh, gosh. Um, okay. I guess I just don't understand, because, you know, they're in the same class together, and they sort of have the same challenges and struggles, and I...I feel like it's a little cruel for Max to be singled out like that.
ANDIE: Uh, well, it wasn't just Max. You know, there were two other kids in the class. Emily specifically told us she doesn't want them at her birthday. We didn't mean for it to be cruel.
KRISTINA: Well, it is cruel. It's a little cruel. I mean, you know, the school says that if one kid is invited to a birthday party that everybody should be invited.
ANDIE: The handbook actually states that if you don't pass out invitations in class, then not everyone has to be included.
KRISTINA: The handbook does say that, but, I mean, the spirit of this school is inclusion, you know, and that's basically all they ever talk about.
ANDIE: Look, my husband and I talked about it. We both feel that one day out of the year, one single day, Emily deserves to have exactly the kind of party that she wants. She works... She works very hard to learn things that come easy for almost everyone else, so I just want to listen to her. And I'm sorry, but as a mother of an aspy kid, I would hope you can just understand that.
KRISTINA: I do, yeah.
[NEW SCENE - Braverman house, exterior. Camille is putting her gardening tools in a bag.]
ZEEK: Howdy, partner.
ZEEK: All right, I got a question. Are you gonna be leaving that class taught by your fling or what?
CAMILLE: I'm not going to dignify that with an answer.
ZEEK: Okay, we got off to a bad start there. How about, are you gonna drop the class?
[Camille looks at Zeek for a few moments.]
CAMILLE: Do you trust me?
ZEEK: Yeah. Yeah, I do.
CAMILLE: Good... Because this is about trust. We have to start trusting each other again. There's absolutely nothing between me and Matthew, absolutely nothing. And, no, I don't want to drop the class. You know, I think this is something that you have to... Get past. We both do.
ZEEK: Yeah. Got it.
[NEW SCENE - Community Center, Alex answers the phone.]
ALEX: Community center.
HADDIE: Uh, hey, is this Alex?
ALEX: Yeah. Hi. Haddie?
HADDIE: Yeah. Oh, you recognized my voice. Um, I'm just... Actually, I'm at that weird guy's party, and I was just wondering, Um, did I... Did I put down that I'm gonna come into work tomorrow? I just wanted to be, uh, sure and that there was no confusion.
ALEX: Yeah. Let me, uh, let me check real quick. Hold on.
ALEX: Yep, I got you down.
HADDIE: Oh, okay. Um, great, then I'll just, uh, be there.
ALEX: You're lucky too. I have a huge compost pile out back with your name written all over it.
ALEX: I know how much you like to get dirty
HADDIE: Well, thank you
ALEX: I mean, dirt.
HADDIE: You're exaggerating a little bit.
ALEX: Little bit.
HADDIE: Yeah. Um, all right, uh... I'll see you tomorrow, then.
ALEX: Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow.
HADDIE: Okay, bye.
[NEW SCENE - Night time, Braverman kitchen.]
AMBER: Is Bedouin real or a Star Wars thing?
SARAH: I don't know.
AMBER: It was a stupid party. I wish I hadn't gone.
SARAH: I'm sorry the party was stupid, but I'm not sorry you had fun with your cousin.
AMBER: Me too. But do you want tea?
SARAH: Um, sure. [Adam enters the house.] Hey!
ADAM: Hey, Amber.
AMBER: Hey, do you want some tea?
ADAM: Uh, yeah, please. Thank you. Thanks, Amber.
SARAH: Okay. Um, so I'll go get that, uh, book.
ADAM: All right.
AMBER: I hope pomegranate is okay. It's all we've got apparently.
ADAM: So your mom tells me that your S.A.T. scores were off the charts.
ADAM: That's great.
AMBER: Thank you.
ADAM: Yeah... A regular prodigy.
ADAM: Yeah. And, uh, and she also mentioned that you might want to talk to my friend Carly Barow who went to Berkeley.
AMBER: There it is.
ADAM: There's what?
AMBER: Look at you bringing it up so casually.
AMBER: This is ridiculous. This is a setup.
ADAM: It's not a setup.
AMBER: I'm being ambushed.
ADAM: No, you're not.
AMBER: Yes. Come on, look at you. You're getting all nervous. This was orchestrated by my mother.
ADAM: No, no, no, this was not orchestrated.
AMBER: Okay, that's great, but it doesn't change the fact that I don't want to have this meeting.
ADAM: This isn't a big deal to you?
AMBER: No, it's not a big deal, okay?
ADAM: Okay, since it's not a big deal, then why don't you just go talk to this woman?
AMBER: Well if it's not a big deal, why don't I just not talk to her?
ADAM: Or if it's not a big deal why don't you just sit
AMBER: Gonna go back and forth about this.
down with a woman who went to Berkeley, loved it, and, you know, so you have a conversation.
AMBER: I just don't want to. I don't know why people keep pushing me to do it. [Starting to get upset.] You don't get it.
AMBER: Every time there's, like, a big thing like this, I always mess it up, and I'm so tired of messing up.
ADAM: Amber... Life will knock you down more times than you can possibly imagine. Don't knock yourself down. Don't avoid feeling embarrassed because you're afraid something's not gonna go well.
AMBER: I'm not embarrassed.
ADAM: So what if it doesn't go well? So what? Amber, you're... A wonderful, talented, and really smart young woman... All right? Put yourself out there. Give yourself a chance.
[NEW SCENE - Morning, Joel and Julia's bedroom, they are getting ready for the day.]
JOEL: The thing I resent is that your brother has no idea how much time it takes to put anything with kids together. He's just like, "Hey, let's sing some songs. It's no big deal."
JULIA: Well, he's new to the dynamic with kids.
JOEL: And you know who's gonna catch the heat when the kids don't know their lines? This guy.
JULIA: I'm sure he knows who's the boss. Gonna be fine.
[NEW SCENE - Morning, Crosby and Jasmine's apartment.]
CROSBY: I'm gonna rock this play. I mean, this might be the first elementary-school play that wins a Tony.
JASMINE: That's so cool that you're taking this on. So is Joel cool with it?
CROSBY: Uh, well, the director is a bit defensive, but I think it's gonna make us closer. Oh, hey, have you seen my box of harmonicas.
JASMINE: Maybe in the front closet?
CROSBY: Because you know what takes a play from kind of good to, like, Broadway good?
CROSBY & JASMINE: [Together] Harmonicas!
JABBAR: Dad, let's go to school.
CROSBY: Um, okay, I'll take you to school. Oh, wait, one quick question.
CROSBY: Um, who's kicking ass at parenting so that their fiancée can kick ass as a visiting artist at Berkeley? Who is that person?
JASMINE: That's you.
CROSBY: Oh, that's me!
JASMINE: That's you! [Kissing] Mwah, mwah, mwah. [To Jabbar.] Hug on mommy.
CROSBY: All right, uh...
JASMINE: Have a good day at school.
CROSBY: We are off. [To Jasmine.] Dance your heart out. [To Jabbar.] Got your backpack, shoes are tied, hair looks great.
JABBAR: Yep, yep.
CROSBY: Let's do it.
CROSBY: Pick up the pace!
JABBAR: You have a hat on.
CROSBY: I always have a hat on.
[NEW SCENE - Kristina supervising some students at Max's school.]
KRISTINA: [Handing Max some markers.] Here you go, babe. [She walks over to another student.] Hi. Emily, right? Here you go. I brought you some more markers.
KRISTINA: I'm Kristina. I'm Max's mommy. Hi. So I heard that you have a birthday coming up. Are you so excited?
EMILY: I'm having a party.
EMILY: I didn't invite Max.
KRISTINA: Yeah, um... Honey, was he...? Was he mean to you?
EMILY: He won't lose.
KRISTINA: I, what do you mean?
EMILY: Every time we play a game, he gets really mad when he loses, says we have to play over and over again. Sometimes I don't want to, then he gets mad again.
KRISTINA: Yeah, who likes that?
EMILY: I don't. So he can't come to my party, 'cause we were going to play games.
[NEW SCENE - T&S Adam's office, Sarah and Amber do a practice interview greeting, shaking hands.]
SARAH: Hi, I'm Carly. Nice to meet you.
AMBER: Hey, how are you?
SARAH: Oh! Ow!
SARAH: What is that?
AMBER: Please, you're so dramatic.
SARAH: That is really too
GORDON: [Entering the office.] Showtime.
AMBER: [Laughing.] I'm sorry. It's just funny that you actually said that.
SARAH: Hey, hey, hey.
AMBER: I'm sorry.
SARAH: Gordon, who set the meeting up.
AMBER: Right. I appreciate it. How are you?
GORDON: Good to see you. Ooh.
AMBER: Ops, what?
AMBER: Well, yeah, I mean, it's just a normal, I'm not gonna do this.
GORDON: Okay. Why don't we go into my office? We'll talk to Carly there, please.
SARAH: Uh, before you go, do you have any tips for her? Maybe, you know, anything about Carly she should know?
GORDON: Um, she loves the Rolling Stones.
SARAH: She loves the rolling stones.
AMBER: I can't use that.
SARAH: Yes, you can!
AMBER: How can you use that? It's a college interview.
SARAH: Work that in. There you go.
GORDON: [To Sarah.] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Here we go.
SARAH: Oh, no, right. All right, have fun.
GORDON: Just a minute, okay?
GORDON: [Entering his office across the hall.] Carly, this is my friend, Amber, and we were hoping...
[Adam walks up looking into Gordon's office.]
SARAH: Hey, don't just stand there. Keep moving. Act normal, act normal.
ADAM: Would you just take it easy?
SARAH: Come on.
[Meanwhile in Gordon's office.]
CARLY: Tell me why you're interested in going to Berkeley.
AMBER: It's a great school.
AMBER: I mean, I don't know as well as you do, but it's supposed to be, you know, very nice. That's why, you know, I would want to go.
CARLY: It is, yeah. Yeah.
[Awkward silence for a few moments.]
AMBER: The Rolling Stones are so great.
CARLY: Oh, you like the Stones?
AMBER: You think so too, right?
CARLY: Yeah, I'm a huge fan.
AMBER: Who doesn't? You know.
CARLY: Yeah, they're awesome.
AMBER: By the way, sorry about this whole thing, you know, my mom asking you to do this, 'cause, I mean, I guess you probably get that a lot, being successful, you know, people wanting your help and making you, you know, meet their children, and, uh, it's just
CARLY: No, it's fine. It's fine. Listen, if you never ask for what you want, you'll never know if the answer's gonna be yes or no. Got to take the risk.
AMBER: Yeah. That makes sense.
AMBER: I, I'm just a little nervous. I'm sorry.
CARLY: It's okay. You don't need to be.
AMBER: It's uncomfortable, 'cause I'm like, "do I just be completely myself and, like, maybe say something that's very stupid," which I've probably already done? [Carly laughs in agreement.] Or should I be, like, acting, like, very smart and mature, or I," you know? I don't know.
CARLY: You just got to be yourself, which you're doing adorably, and it's fine.
CARLY: I bombed my first college interview.
AMBER: What happened?
CARLY: Well, I was afraid to show them that I cared, and, uh, so I acted way above it and too cool and kind of obnoxious, and it was a disaster.
AMBER: How do you know that?
CARLY: 'Cause the interviewer got up to go to the bathroom, and I looked at his little notebook that he'd been scribbling in to see what he was writing, and he had simply written in all caps, "annoying."
AMBER: That's, like, the worst thing.
CARLY: I know. I was, though. I was annoying.
AMBER: What did you do?
CARLY: Nothing. He came back, and I continued acting cool and finished the annoying interview.
AMBER: You kept going? You stuck with it?
CARLY: I had to. Yeah, well, I had to stay.
AMBER: That's amazing. That's pretty extreme.
AMBER: Cool. Well, I don't think you're annoying. I just don't see that.
CARLY: Well, thank you. I don't think you're annoying either.
AMBER: Let's wait till the end of the interview.
CARLY: All right.
[NEW SCENE - Jabbar's class play rehearsals, the kids each have a harmonica and other instruments.]
CROSBY: Okay, everybody, on the count of three, everyone's gonna take your noisemaker and go crazy, all right? One, two, three!
[Joel watches as Crosby and the kids make noise. He looks a little annoyed.]
[NEW SCENE - Night time Zeek waits in a parking lot outside the art class.
ZEEK: Hey. Excuse me.
ZEEK: You the guy that teaches that finger-painting class in there?
MATTHEW: Uh, figure drawing. Yes, for the next couple weeks. I'm Matthew. May I help you?
ZEEK: Right. I'm Zeek Braverman... Camille's husband.
ZEEK: I want you to stay away from my wife, Matthew. You understand?
MATTHEW: Yes. Sure, I get it.
ZEEK: All right.
[NEW SCENE - Max's school, busy hallway outside glasses.
KRISTINA: Andie? Is that you? Oh, hey. How are you? I'm not, I'm not stalking you. I was here. It's Kristina. How are you?
KRISTINA: Listen, um, can I ask you a question?
KRISTINA: I was thinking about something. I, I know that, um, Max and Emily have some issues, okay? And I know that there are things that they need to work out, obviously. But I had a great idea. What if you guys, you and Emily, came over for a playdate with Max and I? And they could, you know, log some hours and sort of see how it goes. I know Max has to work on being a sore loser and things like that. So I thought maybe if you guys came over, we saw how it went, and Max could maybe come to the party.
ANDIE: Okay, I am going to be honest.
ANDIE: I really don't want to get into this again.
KRISTINA: I know. I know that this is so awkward.
ANDIE: Yeah, but you're not getting the fact that I actually said no.
KRISTINA: I know. I heard you say no. But what I'm saying is that I think we need to help each other. I really feel that
ANDIE: Oh my god. I'm so sick of this whole "It takes a village" thing. Look, I'm in this community. I show up. I am here.
KRISTINA: You are, and I know that, and I see that. You know, I know that you are your daughter's biggest advocate, as I am for my son. Otherwise, I wouldn't be pushing this hard. I mean, Andie, have you ever done something so stupid and, and asinine and desperate like this, you know, just wanting to be a champion for your kid? If you haven't, then I'm really embarrassed, and I will leave and walk away, and I won't ask you again if Max can come to the party. I promise you.
ANDIE: I have done some crazy things for Emily.
KRISTINA: See? That's good to know. I just think it could be a wonderful thing, you know? I have this amazing behavioral aide. She'll sit with them and, and facilitate the playdate and have a great time, and you and I, we can talk or have Sushi or something. I mean, it could be really fun.
[NEW SCENE - Camille's art class.]
CAMILLE: Matthew? Matthew? Could you tell me what I'm doing wrong here with the hand? It's, I don't know. It doesn't look like anything that resembles a hand.
MATTHEW: Camille, I think it's better if we don't talk.
CAMILLE: About the drawing?
MATTHEW: No, about anything. Your husband was very clear about that.
CAMILLE: You talked to Zeek? When?
MATTHEW: I don't want to be in the middle of anything, seriously. Let's agree that you'll wait for the feedback on your work until Marcie returns to class, okay? [He walks off to the next student.] Yes, very good.
[NEW SCENE - Community Centre Kitchen. Alex straitens some cans of food just like Haddie has done before stepping back at making a call on his cell phone.]
HADDIE: [In her bedroom.] Hello?
ALEX: What are you doing right now?
[NEW SCENE - T&S, Sarah walks to Gordon's office.]
SARAH: Hey. Got a minute?
GORDON: Hey. What's going on?
SARAH: Uh, I just wanted to say thanks
for setting up that meeting with Carly.
GORDON: Carly, right.
SARAH: Thank you for making that happen. I...
GORDON: It's no big deal.
SARAH: No, it's... It's a big deal. I worry a lot, you know, that all the choices I made haven't helped my kids, and so... I want them to have possibilities. I want... Amber right now to have... Whatever she wants.
GORDON: Well, I think Amber's a really cool kid.
GORDON: You know why? 'Cause you are an awesome mom. I mean that. A sexy one too. What are you doing tonight?
SARAH: Hmm. Mm-mm-mm.
[NEW SCENE - Community Centre, Alex and Haddie playing scrabble.]
HADDIE: Anyway, it's "mobster."
ALEX: Really? You can't use "mobster," 'cause "rf" is not a word.
ALEX: R-f is a word? Rf?
ALEX: All right. How about...
HADDIE: Mm-mm. Mm-mm.
HADDIE: "Begaze" is not a word.
ALEX: Are you jealous of my word?
HADDIE: I'm not jealous. I'm just saying that there's no such thing as "begaze."
ALEX: Look at me for a second. See that, what you're doing? You're "begazing."
HADDIE: [Laughing] Oh.
ALEX: [Laughing] You're "begazing."
HADDIE: No thank you. That's, that's, no way.
ALEX: That's what that is.
HADDIE: No! That's not fair! I'm looking it up in the dictionary.
[NEW SCENE - Braverman shed/workshop, Zeek is fixing an electric motor.]
CAMILLE: So what'd you say to him?
ZEEK: Say to who?
CAMILLE: Yeah, don't play dumb with me. You know exactly what I'm talking about. What did you say to my art teacher?
ZEEK: I told him to stay away from my wife.
CAMILLE: And I told you nothing was going on.
ZEEK: Yeah, well... I wanted to tell him myself.
CAMILLE: It was so humiliating.
ZEEK: It's humiliating for you? What do you think it is for me? It's humiliating for me, Camille! You ask me, and you ask me and ask me to share my feelings with you, and when I do, I tell you how I'm feeling! This situation makes me feel like crap! And you say, "So what?" So I went to your little Portuguese pound cake, and I told him to stay away from what's mine.
CAMILLE: What's yours?
ZEEK: You know what I mean.
CAMILLE: Yeah, I know what you mean
ZEEK: Do you?
I know exactly what you mean. [Zeek throws his work down on the bench as the talk gets heated.] All this time in therapy! Talk about change? You haven't changed. You don't change. You haven't changed a bit.
[She walks out of the workshop.]
CAMILLE: Yeah, really.
[Upset Zeek hits the bench.]
[NEW SCENE - Braverman house, later in the evening. After her date with Gordon Sarah walks toward Amber carrying a foil swan.]
SARAH: What are you doing?
SARAH: In the dark?
[Sarah sits down.]
AMBER: It's not that dark. I should get a book light, though. It's a good investment.
SARAH: What's going on?
AMBER: How was your dinner?
AMBER: [Looking at the swan.] This is cute. Also, I just wanted to let you know that the whole Carly meeting thing...
AMBER: Was pretty good. Here's the part where I tell you that if you cry, I'm gonna have to discontinue the story immediately. Okay?
SARAH: It's like ice in there.
SARAH: I'm fine. I think I'm gonna be all right.
ADAM: I don't know. I, I was nervous at first, like, you know, like I didn't belong there or something, and, like, I was gonna not do well and disappoint you, and... Then, you know, I got in there, and I was like, "I can do this." Like, we were kind of similar, and we were, like, on the same wavelength, and it was surprising, and I just felt like, "Okay, yeah, maybe I can, maybe I can do this. Maybe I can, you know, be smart and successful and..." I don't know. It felt good. So... I know it was probably a big deal for you to get the meeting, and I just wanted to say thanks. It meant a lot.
SARAH: You're welcome.
AMBER: You're crying. You're crying.
SARAH: I did the best I could.
AMBER: Oh, God, mom. Please.
[NEW SCENE - Play date with Emily and
GABY: Max, it looks like she might win this one. Max, what do we say when someone else wins a game?
MAX: Nice game.
GABY: Right, which might actually make you want to play again, right, Emily?
ANDIE: They're spicy.
KRISTINA: [Laugh.] Yeah I know.
ANDIE: For, like, three years, she was wearing the same pair of sweatpants till, literally, they started to evaporate. And I have two older boys. Finally, I had a girl, and I could dress her up in these cute little dresses, but, no, she just walked around in those sweatpants looking like a homeless person.
KRISTINA: Max wore a pirate costume for two years.
ANDIE: Oh, my God.
KRISTINA: Two years, Patch, everything, the whole thing. It was cute, though.
ANDIE: What about obsessions?
KRISTINA: Mine or his?
ANDIE: Hmm, that was good.
KRISTINA: Cheers. [They cling wine classes.] It's good, right? I made this one myself.
ANDIE: You did not.
[NEW SCENE - School elementary play rehearsals. Crosby sings and plays the piano the kids singing badly along with him.]
CROSBY: [Singing.] Gold on the hillside, gold in the stream‚ gold in your pockets‚ gold in your dreams‚ pick up your shovel‚ lace up your shoes‚ hello to glitter‚ light up the fuse
JOEL: Let's take a break, guys.
so long, farewell ‚ ta-ta to the blues.
JOEL: Let's just take a break, collect our thoughts.
CROSBY: Good job, you guys!
JOEL: Just, uh, go work on the set back there.
CROSBY: Uh, why did you stop it, man? Magic was happening.
JOEL: Crosby, we got to, we got to get back to the play, man.
CROSBY: We got to get back to the play? Why?
JOEL: Because it's the play. Because it's what we came here to do. Because they got to memorize their lines. I mean, Crosby, yesterday we spent rehearsal blowing into harmonicas, and now you got them, I don't know what this is.
CROSBY: It's called music, Joel. It's also known as having fun.
JOEL: And it's disorganized
CROSBY: What is cuter than little kids singing? Seriously, why would you not want them to sing?
JOEL: Because it's the history of California, we can't
CROSBY: Who cares about the history of Cal
Listen, principal Taylor asked me to come here and spice it up. That's what I'm trying to do.
JOEL: He what?
CROSBY: He told me to come in here and make sure this thing is good, and I'm trying to do that, but I'm not gonna do it with the history of California. I got to use music and
JOEL: Wow. Okay. All right.
CROSBY: Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. Joel, you're not leaving, are you? Listen, man, we'll put the boring stuff back in too.
JOEL: You don't like how I'm directing the play, Crosby, that's fine. You just, you know what? You, you take it. That's yours. You spice it up however you like.
CROSBY: Joel, I don't dislike how you're directing it. I dislike this. [Holding up the play.] Joel! [Joel walks out, Crosby turns to the students.] Places.
[NEW SCENE - Community Centre.]
CAMILLE: You ready to head home?
CAMILLE: Boy, those little bugs on the tomato plants-- driving me crazy.
CAMILLE: Tenacious little buggers.
HADDIE: I know.
CAMILLE: I've tried every trick.
HADDIE: Yeah. Alex said, uh, last year a bug that got into his shoe and went, it was just a terrible story.
CAMILLE: You've been hanging out with Alex quite a bit lately, haven't you?
CAMILLE: Really, you have. What's going on there?
HADDIE: Can I tell you something?
HADDIE: And you'll keep it just between us?
CAMILLE: Of course.
HADDIE: I like Alex. I like coming here and seeing him here, and he's an amazing person. He's, like, I mean, you know, he's had all this terrible stuff happen to him, and he's not bitter, which is unbelievable. Like, he... He just is... A good guy. I...
CAMILLE: I think it's wonderful. It's wonderful.
HADDIE: Well, you introduced him to me, so thank you.
CAMILLE: You're so beautiful. You're such a beautiful girl. I'm so happy for you.
CAMILLE: Yeah, look at us... Getting all emotional over happy stuff, right?
CAMILLE: Good stuff.
HADDIE: Let's go.
2.09 - Put Yourself Out There
Original Airdate (NBC) November 16, 2010
Written by Bridget Carpenter
Directed by Patrick Norris
Transcribed by Craig Best
Original subtitles from www.addic7ed.com
Please Don't Use Without Permission!
This is a transcript of the aired episode that includes accurate word-to-word dialogues, some settings have been added where needed along with actions and/or camera movements where I felt they were necessary. "PARENTHOOD" and other related entities are owned, their respective companies and no copyright infringement is intended..
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