7.20 - Lorelai? Lorelai? (151)
This was transcribed by Craig Best (aka Lancer1993)

7.20 – Directors cut clip - 2:38 – cwtv.com/video

[Busy, Babette and Miss Patty are talking]

BABETTE: “My funny valentine” it doesn’t work, it’s April already. What about “Down with love” to open.

MISS PATTY: It’s too depressing.

BABETTE: It’s not depressing, it’s ironic.

MISS PATTY: People don’t listen to music for irony.

BABETTE: What about “Weird Al”

MISS PATTY: Weird who?

LORELAI: Hi girls.

MICHEL: Lorelai.

BABETTE: Hi hon.

LORELAI: What’s with the whisper?

BABETTE: We’re saving our voices.

LORELAI: I think that ship has sailed.

MISS PATTY: Oh we’re debuting our cabaret act tonight at KC’s.

LORELAI: OH I thought Saturdays was karaoke night at KC’s.

BABETTE: It is so we went over there this morning to sign our selves up for the first 15 songs.

LORELAI: Well I’m sure the karaoke regulars will love that.

MISS PATTY: So what do you think Lorelai, to open with the show. Streisand or Porter?

LORELAI: You can not go wrong with either one.

MISS PATTY: You gonna be there right.

BABETTE: You gotta come hon, it’s gonna be [louder] fantastic… [quieter] Fantastic.

[Luke comes to the table]


[Lorelai notices something different about Luke]

LUKE: Okay her you go ladies. Little hot water for you Miss Patty and for you Babette a bowl of shredded wheat.

BABETTE: It’s for my throat, it give it a rougher quality, a husk sound sorta like Debbie Herry meets Eithal Herman.

[Lorelai is looking at Luke]

LUKE: What?


LUKE: What?

LORELAI: Nothing.

LUKE: Okay.

LORELAI: I’m just getting some coffee.

LUKE: To go.


LUKE: Coming right up.

[Over at the counter Lorelai spots some stuff on the counter]

LORELAI: Oh you preparing for the big boat trip huh.

LUKE: Yeap.

LORELAI: Wow you want me just to talk in nautical terms till you go.


LORELAI: Eye, eye captain.

LUKE: Please don’t.

LORELAI: Shiver me timbers.

LUKE: Are you done.

LORELAI: All hands on deck. Now I’m done.

LUKE: Good.

LORELAI: So where you going?

LUKE: Ah we’re thinking of heading up the coast.

LORELAI: Oh up is good.

LUKE: Should be fine.

LORELAI: You’re really going on a boat trip, you sure that’s a good idea.

LUKE: What’s wring with a boat trip?

LORELAI: Well for starters you’re on a boat.


LORELAI: So, anything could go wrong, you’re on a boat in the middle of no where, haven’t you seen “Dead Calm” “Open Water” “Das Boot”.

LUKE: Okay first of all I did not purchase a U boat.

LORELAI: Titanic, surely you’ve seen Titanic!

LUKE: Aprils very excited about this.

LORELAI: Sure she is.

LUKE: Here’s your coffee.

LORELAI: Look instead of paying for this can I just give you some of my stage advice.

LUKE: I’d rather have the dollar.

LORELAI: April says she’s very excited.

LUKE: Very excited.

LORELAI: Yeah she says she’s very excited, but if I were you I would plan a couple of nights at a hotel so she can wash her hair and order room service. That’s what I would don.

LUKE: Okay.

LORELAI: Okay, and if you’re heading up the coast you have to spend as much time as possible on the southern coast of Maine.

LUKE: Yeah.

LORELAI: And you have to go to a place called Barnacle Billies.

LUKE: “Barnacle Billies”

LORELAI: The best lobster you have every had and you sit on the deck and never want to leave.

LUKE: Okay I’ll check it out.

LORELAI: [Smiling] For all that extra advice don’t I get a donut?

[Luke lifts the cover]

LORELAI: Thank you very much.

LUKE: Mu-mm

LORELAI: Bye Patty, bye Babette.

BABETTE AND MISS PATTY: [singing together] So long, farewell. Auf weidersehen goodbye, goodbye.


Written by: David S. Rosenthal
Directed by: Bethany Rooney

Transcribed by Craig Best for http://www.crazy-internet-people.com/site/gilmoregirls

This is a transcript of the aired episode that includes accurate word-to-word dialogues, some settings have been added where needed along with actions and/or camera movements where I felt they were necessary.
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